Mind Boggling
by blackcat9517
Summary: The Joker muses his relationship with Harley.


A lot of people find The Joker and Harley Quinn's twisted, tumultuous relationship quite odd. Some think that the reason why she hasn't left him is because if Harley left The Joker, she'd end up dead. Some on the other hand, couldn't care less. Both of them are insane, end of story. However, their relationship could be one of the hottest debates in history. People are confused as to why Harley kept on clinging to him despite the fact that he abuses her. It's just mind boggling. Don't be surprised if somebody majoring in Psychology decided to write a paper about their relationship.

Almost everyone knows that Harley used to be a successful psychologist who applied for an internship at Arkham. Nobody would volunteer to work at that asylum. You'd have to be crazy! No pun intended. As a matter of fact, most doctors who work there were either transferred there against their will or had worked there before the asylum was inhabited by the criminally insane.

One may think that The Joker is just using her for his own selfish purposes and couldn't care less if something bad were to happen to her. Let's face it, he pretty much seduced her during their sessions together so that he could escape the asylum easier rather going through the usual trouble of busting out. After all, it was a good gag if you think about it. A doctor, helping her insane patient escape and doing everything he tells her to. Now that's funny. To The Joker that is.

The Joker couldn't help but feel as confused with their relationship sometimes, during the sleepless nights he would occasionally get. It was one of those stupid nights again. He lay awake in the dark, silent bedroom. Right beside him, Harley slept peacefully, hugging him like a teddy bear and for some weird reason, he didn't shove her off of him. His eyes narrowed in annoyance. Why did he let her cling to him in the first place? Had she always sleep like this with him? Just as he was about to kick her off of him, Harley stirred in her sleep, a smile present on her face as she draped an arm across his torso. The Joker blinked a couple of times. What does she think he is? An oversized plush toy she could simply cuddle with?

The Clown Prince of Crime gritted his teeth, obviously annoyed by his girlfriend as well as the fact that he couldn't sleep. Then, it hit him- girlfriend. How long has it been since they've been together? He couldn't remember, but one thing for sure is that it felt as if they're married. She knew him too well. She knew that every morning, he needed his coffee, his paper ready on the table and of course, a box of his favourite cereal needs to be ready. Harley didn't cook. She was terrible at it. That thought itself made him laugh aloud, causing her to stir once more, mumbling something incoherent before snuggling closer to him. The Joker recalled the time when Harley had attempted to make toast but ended up burning them for the hundredth time. When will she ever learn?

She was useless alright. Barely knows how to cook, always spoiling his plans, always screwing up, a complete klutz at times and yet here she was, sleeping like a rock next to him. Why hadn't he killed her yet? She's constantly weighting him down and not to mention that stupid nickname she gave him, 'Puddin''. He hates it but then again, after being with her for years, he eventually got used to it. He eventually got used to her presence in his life. Has she really made a huge impact on his life? Things had certainly gotten better. He didn't have to worry about his suit, the condition of the hideout, his pet hyenas and let's not forget his socks. Harley took care of all those things. Things his complex mind doesn't have time to think of. Maybe she wasn't so useless after all. Dames. Can't live with them, can't live without them. He chuckled once more, this time waking up a very sleepy Harley.

"Puddin'?" she whispered, lifting her head from his chest to face him.

"Go back to sleep, Harley," he murmured.

She smiled sleepily at him before leaning to kiss him and rested her head on his chest once more "I love you, Puddin',"

"Of course you do, Dollface," The Joker replied before kissing the top of her head. His eyes started to feel heavy. As he slowly succumbs to the lack of sleep, he thought, maybe, just maybe, deep down, he actually cares for her. Now that's one hell of a gag.

Where's the Philosoraptor when you need it?

**The End**


End file.
